haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
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