you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
