Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
