Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
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