I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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