Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
