i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I won't apologize to a one balled man
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
