i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
