I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
are you so shy because you have an std?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
