i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
