I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
