Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
