Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize