He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
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