Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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