he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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