you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
