What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
