i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize