It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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