I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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