oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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