i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
