is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
