Are we in a gay sports bar?
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
