South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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