its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Randomize
