Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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