dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
