just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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