I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
