When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
