we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
