shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Randomize
