I saw his package. It spoke to me.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize