chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I am mentally ready for anal.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
