bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
