I like my sex mixed with concussions.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Life is so much better after having sex.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
