I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
