Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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