STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
