i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
