ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
