Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
