She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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