I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Enjoy the penises
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
