yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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