Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
