carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
