Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
